Not a Ravens Fan, But...

This hurts:

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Now the birds' situation looks all the more desperate; you don't want to ruin Flacco with WR scrubs. Harrison's leverage just skyrocketed.

On the Bolts side of things, I still can't understand why so many predict a large fall for this season. Both for the team and LT. Last year, the Chargers' two best players were out (LT was essentially out with his toe injury) and they still made the playoffs, and ohbytheway beat the hottest team in the NFL at the time, the Colts. All without a sliver of pass D.

This is a young team that gets better every year. The fact that opponents now need to plan for Sproles as well as LT suggests a minor renaissance for the big man. Merriman will cause havoc, especially if English is any good. Rivers had the best QB rating in the league last year, throwing TDs to 9 different players. Once the D improves, the offense will look that much better.

Will they win 14 games again? No. Will they win their division? Likely. Will the "hard" schedule hurt them? A little I suppose. But even in their "terrible" year last year, they amassed a 5-1 record in their division, 6-0 if not for Hochuli. The Bolts under Turner have consistently won when it matters most. I expect more of the same this season.

- Matt

NHL Season Preview

Who cares beyond that.

The Curious Case of Benjamin Roethlisberger

It is no secret I'm not a fan of Ben Roethlisberger.

Let me amend that. I'm a fan of his style of play. I think he's the most clutch quarterback in the NFL. I think every team needs a QB like him in order to win.

But the guy is an insufferable douche.

So when news broke of Big Bitch being sued for sexual assault, I began to think, how probable is this to be true?

Naturally, superstars (especially ones that have just gotten national recognition for winning championships) are prone to scams and parasites trying to make a quick buck, just for existing. So when someone says an athlete did something to them, I'm a little naturally inclined to disbelieve them, especially when they are from a lower socioeconomic background. However, the ultimate say goes to the athlete's character. Not as a leader, or on the field personality, but as a human being. How do they typically treat people they view as "beneath them", beyond the mandatory community service given to them by their agent. And in the 5 years I've lived in Pittsburgh, I can unequivocally say, Ben Roethlisberger is a douche.

Naturally, there are two "most likely" scenarios that have happened:

1. Roethlisberger has had no interaction with this girl in his life, and she's trying to get money off the Super Bowl winning quarterback.

2. Roethlisberger partied like a douchey frat boy with this girl, but did not sexually assault her.

Usually I would add "the girl consented and later claimed she didn't" to the list, but I don't see it in this case.

Now, look at this one comment by Roethlisberger's lawyer:

"This weekend Andrea McNulty served Ben Roethlisberger with a civil complaint accusing him of sexually assaulting her in July 2008. Ben has never sexually assaulted anyone; especially Andrea McNulty." Bold mine.

What the fuck does that even mean? Is it a poor choice of words, or deliberately trying to publicly humiliate the woman for daring to file a suit? If he indeed sexually assaulted her, it could be revenge for her opening her mouth. It just seems that, in a position with nothing to gain and everything to lose, why would you add that last part in a prepared statement? The rest of the quote:

"The timing of the lawsuit and the absence of a criminal complaint and a criminal investigation are the most compelling evidence of the absence of any criminal conduct."

Yeah, good luck with that argument. It's not like being sexually assaulted is a traumatic experience and the majority of victims go unreported. Oh wait.

My point is, on first examination, it seems like another case of someone trying to profit off of a superstar. However, there are enough quirks to this story to legitimize the suit, and even those with black-and-gold-colored glasses have to admit, it's entirely possible Roethlisberger assaulted this girl.

Alternate Theory: his lawyer is a huge douche, and is not only exercising his douchedom, but by inserting his foot squarely into his mouth, he might give more credence to the opposing argument and be able to bleed his client for more money. Good times.

- Matt

July Blows

So bored.

Here’s an NHL awards prediction for next year:

Art Ross: Evgeni Malkin
Why: He’s the best player in the NHL.

Hart Trophy: Alexander Ovechkin
Why: The sportswriters that vote for MVP won’t stop picking him as long as he gets 50 goals a season.

Vezina: Martin Brodeur
Why: Jacques Lemaire should be murdered. His D will protect Brodeur.

Jack Adams: Ron Wilson
Why: The Maple Leafs are making the playoffs.

Rocket Richard: Alexander Ovechkin
Why: Who else?

Calder: John Tavares
Why: Because he’s the first teenager since Crosby to live up to the hype.

Selke: Pavel Datsyuk
Why: I’m assuming he stays healthy.

Norris Trophy: Niklas Lidstrom
Why: He should win it every year.

Surprises: Toronto Maple Leafs, Minnesota Wild
Disappointments: New York Rangers, San Jose Sharks
Good or Poop: Tampa Bay Lightning, Anaheim Ducks

Stanley Cup: Vancouver over Boston in 6. Whatever.

Real Stanley Cup: Penguins over Everyone Else in 3.

- Matt

You'll Get Goosebumps

This just in:

The Penguins are Stanley Cup champions.

While I kid, take a look at possibly the most amazing video ever made-

http://www.benstonium.com/pens_tribute_2009.htm

If that doesn't make your arm hair stand on end, nothing in this world will.

I know I haven't said much about anything on this blog for ages.

But when your favorite team in your favorite sport wins your favorite championship, with your favorite current athlete holding the most storied trophy in all of sports, with your favorite athlete of all time smiling and looking on, well...



You said it, Metallica.

Go Pens. Go O's. Fuck the haters.

- Matt

Hahahahahahahaha Suck itttttttt

Woooooooo

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