Worst Fans of 2009

I hate lists. This is a reason I have little to no respect for Rolling Stone. Don't get me wrong, I like to see which shitty group they're touching themselves over annually. Gratuitous Arcade Fire and Arctic Monkeys are highly overrated comment. But I do like hyperbole, and Best/Worst lists often accomplish it.

I'll do a blurb on the Best Fans too, but I'm a pessimist so let's focus on the negative.

NBA

Worst Fans: ESPN. Seriously, the NBA is a terrible product.

Best Fans: The ones who died in 2009.


MLB

Worst Fans: New York Yankees. There will never be a year they don't win this. And if you think they were bad when their team was semi-likeable, think about how bad they'll be this year.

Best Fans: Orioles. Duh.

Best Fan: Greg Slovin, the only Marlins fan in existence.


NFL

Worst Fans: Pittsburgh Steelers. You've won 2 of the last 4 Super Bowls, amassed a 65-31 record in 6 years, had only three head coaches since the 70s, and won the most Super Bowls of any team EVER... but "what have you done for me lately" is still the prevailing motto of Steeler Nation. Even when the team went 12-4 and won a Super Bowl, fans complained it wasn't as good as the Cowher teams (somehow). Combine that with the most annoying blame game ever played, and you have a team whose fans edge out the Patriots in annoyance.

Best Fans: No such thing as a "best" NFL fan.


MLS

Worst Fans: I have no idea. Let's say New England Revolution. Yeah, why not.

Best Fans: Seattle. Nuff said.


NHL

Worst Fans: Washington Capitals. It takes pure skill to beat out the Flyers any year. But if you look past the extreme fairweather nature, the lack of any semblance of hockey knowledge, the knuckle-dragging mindset, the hero worship of douchebags, the sense of entitlement without ever accomplishing anything of value, and the ADD nature of their arena that appeals to brain-dead children, you still have much to hate. For example: the pacifiers incident, the popularity of the "Crosby Sucks" song (seriously, the Flyers do the Crosby Sucks thing so much better), the organization-wide penis envy of the Penguins (check Ted's blog weekly), the fact the owner talks down to his fans like they're retarded, how the top levels of the organization sells fake tickets to fans of opposing teams, the steroids scandal that's somehow stayed quiet, and my most hated, the COWBELLS. Oh, and how their mongoloid fans slam their hairy palms against the class whenever an opposing player is in remote proximity. In short (too late), this is the worst bunch of mouth-breathing turds in a sport that doesn't need any more reason to be shunned by the national media.

Best Fans: Calgary Flames. Never met one I didn't like. And the C of Red (which predates Rock the Red by decades) is beast.

- Matt