Divisional Round

I'll be brief, because nothing annoys me about football more than excessive talk in the weeks leading up to later-round games.

Arizona @ New Orleans

As sure as the Sun will rise, people are going to look waaaaay too much into Kurt Warner's epic performance last week. But durrrr, Green Bay had such a good defense durrr. Yeah, against bad teams. They couldn't get it done against solid teams that still gave a shit all season, I can't believe I picked them to advance. Anyway, the Saints are much better than people think (somehow). Sure, they lost 3 in a row, but after Dallas, a good team, beat them, they looked like they lost their regular season drive. Now the times are different, and they will step up.

Prediction: Saints 41, Cardinals 24


Baltimore @ Indianapolis

Today I added cole slaw to the list of food I hate to eat using a spoon. Among the rest: mashed potatoes, vegetables of any kind, applesauce (to be fair, it's been like 10 years since I had it), stew, cake (except ice cream cake), and pineapple. If you can stab it, you can use a fork. Spoons are just stupid. If you use one for every meal, you probably wear a helmet.

I know a lot of people who root for the Ravens, but I just can't get excited about this game. Hell, I was more excited about Jets vs Bengals. Stover will make Baltimore sincerely regret his departure.

Prediction: Colts 26, Ravens 17


Dallas @ Minnesota

I'm banking on the Cowboys to win. I really don't want them to, but they probably will. I'm hoping the burden of expectations after finally winning a playoff game overwhelms them, and they revert back to postseason form. If not, I at least get to see Favre stab yet another city in the chest with his choke-tastic performance.

Cowboys 24, Vikings 20


New York @ San Diego

This is one of those standard "test" games where the favorite looks like they'll win 7 out of 10 times by a blowout, the game will be close in either favor twice out of 10, and 1 out of 10 produces an unbelievable result (like the Pats in the Super Bowl two years ago). Of all the remaining AFC teams, the Jets present the best matchup against the Chargers. Unfortunately for the Jets, they're also worse than the Ravens and Colts. It'll be interesting to see how Revis covers VJ, or if Gates will just have a monster day. I say Malcom Floyd turns out to be the most significant member of the Chargers on Sunday.

And before you try out the tired "Chargers can't stop the run or run the ball snarf snarf" argument, here's a list of top rushing / rush d teams the Chargers have beaten this season:

@ NYG, @ DAL, vs. PHI, vs. WAS (2nd string), vs. MIA, @ TEN.

One of the most misleading things about the Chargers is that despite getting under 1000 yards, LT still had 12 TDs. Turning 1st and goals into TDs is EXTREMELY IMPORTANT, something that damns all losing teams. If the Steelers had LT, they'd be in the second round of the playoffs. As in hockey, but maybe to a lesser extent, stats become meaningless in the playoffs. Of course, sports media needs you to believe that analyzing stats and percentages will give you insider insight into games. And by extension of that, you should watch ESPN. The will to win trumps all, and few teams look more determined than the Chargers. The Jets' manic-depressive coach will again lose all hope in his players this week.

Chargers 34, Jets 20

Not brief after all. Whatever.

- Matt