Like Finding $20 In Your Girlfriend's Boobs

Kudos to Will for pointing this out to me.

Over the years, I've condensed sports news out of Washington into small factoids:

* Redskins pay out the ass for washed-up, asshole Free Agent

* Capitals upset in 2nd round of playoffs despite excellent regular season

* Wizards have stupidest name ever (and stole the Bullets from the better city)

But today, I was treated to a special tidbit of information. Apparently, the Nationals' prized prospect was not who or how old they thought he was:

[Rob Neyer]

Just how dumb is this mistake? The Nasty Nats paid him $1.4 million. For reference, in 1989, the only player getting paid more than that by the Orioles was Cal Fucking Ripken, Jr. Honestly, there's not much to say about this, except the Nationals almost make the Pirates look like a well-managed franchise. Just kidding, the Pirates are pretty much the worst club ever.

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In other, happier news, I'm going to sign up for the MLB Gamecenter whatever the hell they call it thing. This means I'll be able to still watch O's games this year, and thus occasionally write a recap. In case you're unfamiliar with my writing style, it will be extremely sarcastic and openly question the heterosexuality of any opposing pitcher, as well as imply they itch their bellies.

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Big news expected out of Brian Roberts tomorrow. Since this is a rumor I read on Orioles Hangout's message boards, I won't bother linking. If I took message boards seriously, I'd think Jordan Staal was getting traded to Atlanta every 40 seconds.

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Root for anyone playing the Panthers, Hurricanes, Canadiens, Sabres, or Rangers, in that order.

- Matt